A Bloodbowl God.
My name is Chris T.N.O. (The Number One) Primadonna and I am a Bloodbowl God, in training no more.
My Heroic Journey has come to an end. I have searched wide and deep for what it means to be a Bloodbowl God, and found wisdom at the end of the trail. I will not become God’s Gift to Bloodbowl by becoming a copy of someone else, I should have never bothered with peasants’ skills. A halfling can be on guard. A linerat can have claws. Neither of them can be the champion I will be.
Through my journey I’ve risen above traditional skills and I have come up with my own unique recipe for success, my training is complete!
Nerves of steel, plant bending skills, a prehensile tail and an Icy Gaze make me a unique player, something never seen before on the pitch. I will score dozens of touchdowns and I will dedicate each of them to my sweet lord Slaneesh, at least until I am loved and lusted after enough to take my own place between the Gods of the Old World.
But I need to be smart about this. I am the first of a new breed and new things scare people, while I need to be adored. For now I will need to hide my tail until it is really needed, and my Icy Gaze will be revealed only when the time comes for it to be my trademark and bring the big sponsorship money in.
I do not want to share the spotlight with Wardancers, or to share a locker room with Nurgle Warriors. I will hide my tail and gaze under a long mantle and a visor, I will join the Kingdom of Swadia!
Dear Lords and Ladies of the Orca Cola Championship, you are all cordially invited to the adoubement of Chris T.N.O. (The Noble One) Primadonna, to be held on the pitch of the Kingdom of Swadia moments before the inaugural kickoff of Season 24.